Advice For Dating A Widow or Widower
Loss is one of the biggest characteristics of life in general and coming to terms with such a happening can be extremely difficult. In the case of losing a partner or spouse it can be particularly hard to take and the initial feeling that you cannot bring yourself to move on with your life is not at all uncommon to experience. If you find yourself in the situation where you seem to have a mutual attraction with someone who has lost their wife or husband then it is certainly natural to have a few apprehensions about dating them. Each person is different with regard to how they deal with losing a loved one but here are some pieces of advice for dating a widow or widower.
Understand the loss
The first thing that you have to ensure is that you understand their loss and do not treat it as anything other than a highly significant part of their life. Even if the man or woman was with their partner for a short time or the majority of their life to that point, it is guaranteed to have been a huge thing for them to go through. The worst approach to have in this scenario is to make the other person feel that they cannot talk about the partner they have lost. Although it may be a more challenging situation than a so-called conventional relationship it is quite possible to make a success of it, but be sensitive to their loss.
Give them time
Understanding the loss that a widow or widower has gone through also includes allowing them the time they need to make decisions because their emotions can be put under severe strain. Let them see the possibilities that lie before them in this new relationship but never try to do it in a forceful way. Give them the time that they need to come to a decision, whether this is arranging your first date together or when deciding on more serious things down the line such as moving in together.
The need to be true to yourself is talked about on many occasions and in this specific situation it is crucial. There is a big difference between recognising how important a former partner or spouse was to someone and actually trying to act as an exact replacement and be like they were. You should always try to act with patience and understanding but you should only persist with the relationship if you truly believe it can work.
Sara Adams lost her husband twelve years ago but was able to start a new relationship in time thanks to online dating. She has been with her partner for four years and recommends http://www.relationship.com.