When a family goes through divorce, children suffer the most. No matter how amicable the divorce is, the affects are severe on children and are quite long lasting. Divorce affects kids in different ways. During divorce both the parents must work together to help children overcome the effects of divorce. Most couples decides to go separate ways rather than fighting on a daily basis, however, recent studies have shown that children feel exactly the opposite. According to a survey most children would prefer their parents to fight every day rather than seeing them live separately. When this unwanted separation comes in picture, it starts affecting the child’s well being in a negative manner
Once a divorce is done, a child is forced to live with one parent. The departure of other parents gives rise to the feeling of being unwanted in children and makes them think that they are the prime reason behind the divorce. You need to communicate more with the children and make them understand that they are not responsible for divorce. You also need to make them understand they are not unwanted and no matter what happens you will not leave them.
When parents part ways then children know that their world is going to change forever and things are going to be different and most likely not for the better. The pain of having their life disturbed so abruptly affects children in quite a negative manner. Some of the disturbing effects of divorce are steep drop in performance in school, drug usage and being abusive and aggressive. These things can be easily avoided just by being involved more in the life of the children. Neglecting your children after divorce can lead to disastrous outcome.
Stress involved in divorce is too much to bear but when children are involved, then you need to keep your children at top priority. No matter how much trauma, grief and sorrow you are going through, you need to keep them to yourself and work for the betterment of the children. If the divorce process is still going on and your spouse is in the same house then you need to work with your spouse as much as possible to keep life normal.
Avoid speaking anything negative about your ex spouse no matter how bad that person was as your children do not need to hear it from you. A child can adjust with the passing time and will make up their mind about living with one parent, but if you continue to speak bad about the other parent, it will make them feel uncomfortable and unknowingly you will be making things difficult for the children. Negative talks about your ex spouse will make them feel that they are doing something very bad by still loving and caring for the other parent.
Developing healthy relations with your ex spouse will help your children in moving on. Taking children to amusement parks or movies will pass on the message to the children that their parents don’t live together, but they still care for each other and can be together without any conflicts.
Read more information about divorce advice for men or women with children at www.edivorceadvice.com.